


Terrible

by AutisticWriter



Series: 100 Prompt Challenge [79]
Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Agender Character, Agender First Doctor, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Autism, Autism Spectrum, Autistic Doctor (Doctor Who), Background Ian Chesterton/Barbara Wright, Family, Friendship, Gen, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Gift Fic, Music, Post-Serial: s010 The Dalek Invasion of Earth, Prompt Fill, Stimming, Triple Drabble
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-07
Updated: 2017-07-07
Packaged: 2018-11-28 23:27:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11428476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AutisticWriter/pseuds/AutisticWriter
Summary: The Doctor misses Susan.[Prompt 79 – Terrible]





	Terrible

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Pearlislove](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pearlislove/gifts).



> Written for Pearlislove, who gave me the following prompt:
> 
> "The Doctor after Susan left the TARDIS"
> 
> I hope you like it! :)

Everything is so different without Susan. Of course, they know she has to leave, and they support their Granddaughter in her life... but that doesn’t change how strange it feels to be inside the TARDIS without Susan.

As soon as the TARDIS dematerialises after the Doctor’s goodbye speech to Susan, they drop to their knees. Their hands go to their head, running their fingers through their hair in an attempt to calm the emotions flooding their brain. Sadness, fear... numbness.

Their words drain away, leaving the Doctor nonverbal as they slump on the control room floor. They try to think of the good parts of this situation, but that doesn’t stop the Doctor fighting back tears as they struggle to acknowledge that Susan is gone.

 

* * *

 

Ian and Barbara understand the Doctor’s situation, but their reassurance doesn’t help.

“I’m sorry you’re feeling so low,” Barbara says, her arm around Ian’s waist. “This is a lot to get used to, isn’t it?”

The Doctor nods, smiling weakly.

“We miss her too, Doctor,” Ian says sadly.

_Yes, but Susan isn’t your Granddaughter, Chatterton_ , the Doctor would have said. But they are still nonverbal, so they simply scowl and walk away.

 

* * *

 

They miss Susan’s music. The TARDIS seems oddly quiet without her tinny radio playing 1960s popular music, without Susan dancing and Ian and Barbara joining in, dancing together as though the Doctor’s TARDIS was some kind of dance hall. And, as much as they tried to frown, the Doctor’s foot often tapped, stimming to the music as they watched their Granddaughter enjoy herself.

 

* * *

 

One night, the Doctor searches the TARDIS’s databanks, scrolling through the Earth Music section. And then the TARDIS is full of Susan’s favourite song.

And the Doctor wipes a tear from their eye as they think about their dear Susan.


End file.
